Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Question/Answer

My three year old keeps asking for the same thing over and over and over!! How can I respond so she'll stop?
Example
Daughter: "I'm thirsty"
Mom: "Would you like water or milk?"
(state the choice as a question, instead of "you can have water or milk")
Daughter: "But I want juice!"
Mom: (with lot's of empathy) "I know" or "What did I say?" .... "water or milk?"
Daughter: "I WANT JUICE!!"
Mom: (after 10 short seconds) "Nice try.... looks like water"
(if she doesn't choose, you make the choice for her)
Then you can hand her the water. If she decides to throw a fit and toss the cup -
Mom: Empathetically say, "Ooohhh.... looks like you're alll done." (And take away the cup). If she continues to throw a fit, lovingly scoop her up and take her to her room while saying:
"Uh Oohhhh.... looks like you need a little bedroom time coming. This is sooo sad. I'll see you when you're sweet, plus a few minutes."
When she has calmed down, set a timer for about 3 minutes. When the timer goes off, go get her out of her room and LOVE HER UP. This will let her know that you love her, but not her fit. when she comes out of her room, she can try again with the milk or water.
By removing her from the situation, it teaches her that she is welcome to be with you and the family when she can be sweet.

This technique can be used for ALL kinds of choices you give your young children.

No comments:

ShareThis