Question of the Week
What can I do to make bedtime smooth,
loving and stress free with my 3 year old?
Choices… lots of choices!!
If verbal choices don’t seem to be doing the trick, try visual ones. For example: take a picture of your child doing each night time activity, like brushing their teeth, reading a book, sleeping, picture of a clock with the starting time, etc. Take the pictures and put them on cards. Then each night, have them choose the order of their routine (always beginning with the picture of the clock and ending with the sleeping card – they choose the order of the cards in between). Allowing them to choose the order often squelches any tantrums.
If they still decide to throw a fit, you can lovingly say: “Ohhhh…. Looks like we’re allll done.” Gently scoop them up and take them to their room. Give them a hug and a kiss; while still giving the child choices like: “Did you want the light on or off? The door open or closed? One book or two books? I leave the door open for kids who stay in their bed….etc.” Whatever choices you normally offer them when you’re leaving their room.
Remember, there’s always tomorrow to try again! Ending the bedtime routine in this way should only need to happen for a few nights – the child generally gets the idea that they are welcome to be with you and get to do the routine with choices when they can be sweet.
Really important: Have a practice session during the daytime! Have lots of fun and role play how the bedtime routine might go…. Then finish it off with a treat! Here’s how you can say it: “Hey buddy, let’s do something really silly…. Let’s pretend its bedtime & see who can do it the fastest. Then we’ll eat ice cream when we’re done. Ready? Okay, it’s time for bed. Let’s get our cards out….. etc.”
Make sure you continue to give lots of choices that night (and every night) after the practice session. If this doesn’t resolve after a few days, there may be something else going on. If this is your concern, please give us a call at 602.295.9611 and we would be happy discuss it.
Have fun parenting! We would love to hear your stories! If you have a question you would like me to answer, please email it to natalie@kerimaughan.com
If verbal choices don’t seem to be doing the trick, try visual ones. For example: take a picture of your child doing each night time activity, like brushing their teeth, reading a book, sleeping, picture of a clock with the starting time, etc. Take the pictures and put them on cards. Then each night, have them choose the order of their routine (always beginning with the picture of the clock and ending with the sleeping card – they choose the order of the cards in between). Allowing them to choose the order often squelches any tantrums.
If they still decide to throw a fit, you can lovingly say: “Ohhhh…. Looks like we’re allll done.” Gently scoop them up and take them to their room. Give them a hug and a kiss; while still giving the child choices like: “Did you want the light on or off? The door open or closed? One book or two books? I leave the door open for kids who stay in their bed….etc.” Whatever choices you normally offer them when you’re leaving their room.
Remember, there’s always tomorrow to try again! Ending the bedtime routine in this way should only need to happen for a few nights – the child generally gets the idea that they are welcome to be with you and get to do the routine with choices when they can be sweet.
Really important: Have a practice session during the daytime! Have lots of fun and role play how the bedtime routine might go…. Then finish it off with a treat! Here’s how you can say it: “Hey buddy, let’s do something really silly…. Let’s pretend its bedtime & see who can do it the fastest. Then we’ll eat ice cream when we’re done. Ready? Okay, it’s time for bed. Let’s get our cards out….. etc.”
Make sure you continue to give lots of choices that night (and every night) after the practice session. If this doesn’t resolve after a few days, there may be something else going on. If this is your concern, please give us a call at 602.295.9611 and we would be happy discuss it.
Have fun parenting! We would love to hear your stories! If you have a question you would like me to answer, please email it to natalie@kerimaughan.com
*Interested in parenting classes to get more help? go to http://www.kerimaughan.com/*
